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By David DeAngelo
***QUESTION***
Hey D,
I've been subscribing to the newsletters and just got your book.
Super stuff dude. I've naturally been C&F to the girls I don't
really like but they stick to me. I've been a super wuss to
the ones I like and it's like trying to stick the same polar
ends of a magnet together.
Lemme share this. I was out with a 6 pointer girl i met over
the net (using your on-line profile of course!) We met up with
a few of my other friends and went to a club. There, I left
my friend to fend for herself while i got on to meet new people.
There was this hoochie-mama (9.9) and I got talking with her.
Didn't give her any compliments like i would normally do. I
noticed that she was wearing a white/blue dress but had her
toenails painted red. I just said "Why are your toes red? Don't
you know that red and blue don't match, especially on your toes?
You color blind or something?" Shocker. The look on her was
priceless.
Continued talking and she said "those guys there are oogling
at me non-stop. At which point I said "Don't be modest. They're
just desperate."
Came to a point where I just asked so what's your number? She
just grabbed my mobile and keyed it in before i could say abracadabra.
The other girl was just observing me and started to get restless
and came over to sit next to me. She had her head on my shoulders
and started to tell the hoochie-mama that I'm playing THE game.
"Hello...Who invited you into this conversation?" was my response
to that.
Anyway, i decided to leave even though the 9 pointer kept asking
me to follow her to another place. Drove the other one home
and well...she was basically all over me dude.
Gonna call the mama soon. Any advice. Sorry it's long but just
had to tell. Felt like a million dollars. And my advice to others
is, you really have to live being C&F and not be overawed by
the 9 pointer for you to get anywhere. Live the book, don't
learn it.
Cheers,
~ A, Far East
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Dude, you're kind of like some kind of combination
of Austin Powers and a bad Hip Hop group.
But I'm feelin' ya flow, dog.
Good job using the online personals material
to meet a cute girl.
A lot of guys pass up the online personal
thinking that only desperate and unattractive women would be
running online personal ads...
Of course, nothing could be further from
the truth.
There are all kinds of women online who are
running personal ads... for all different reasons.
And personal ads give you the chance to communicate
on a more “even playing field” with women... you
and she both have to actually COMMUNICATE.
It's good stuff, especially when you're familiar
with the style of communication that you've learned from my
materials.
As far as advice on the “mama”,
just keep doing what you're doing.
And DON'T turn into WussBoy as you get to
know her.
There's nothing that will kill ATTRACTION
faster than turning into a Girl Man just as she starts to like
you.
***QUESTION***
Mr. DeAngelo
i know you get a lot of questions and things but i have a dire
situation. I have your advanced series the book and dvd the
works... great stuff i love every minute of it because this
comes so natural to me. I was doing it to everyone already but
just not to women bc my mother brought me up to treat women
nice and buy flowers etc...i don't know where id be had i not
stumbled upon your web site one day.
anyway on to my dire question, this is not for myself its for
my best buddy. Im not sure when, but i suspect he may have had
an operation to remove his balls. His girlfriend and I are good
friends and she and i chat once in awhile about my friend and
how everything is going. She dropped him off at the airport
the other day, he was leaving to visit family in California...
for THREE days. one, two, three. 3!! AND HE CRIED! I have done
my best to help him by forwarding newsletters and he understands
them when he reads them, but only in theory, he takes no action.
I have even tried to explain certain things to him. as of late
i have given up. I wasn't sure if you did door to door he man
bitch slap service but i would gladly pay for it. anyway i don't
know how or if you can help but i didn't know who else to turn
to. If there is anything you recommend i should do please tell
me. His gf tells me hes acting weird lately and smothering her
and her mother has even told him to back away. should i attempt
to tell him this? thanks for anything i did my best to keep
this short.
~A.R., Seattle, Washington
MY COMMENTS:
Well, it sounds to me like YOU'RE not the
one who has the “dire situation”.
Sounds like it's your buddy.
I mean, you realize of course that he IS
going to screw this up... and at some point in the future you
ARE going to have to either:
1) Listen to her complain about how he's
being a WussBag and how she doesn't need another girlfriend...
she has plenty.
2) Listen to HIM complain about how she seems
to be acting less and less “happy” in general, and
more and more annoyed at him... even though he's being “nicer
and nicer” to her.
3) Listen to them both whine and complain
after she DUMPS HIS ASS for acting like such a girl.
4) Endure some combination of the above.
Some guys just get so caught up in their
emotions that they refuse to even entertain the idea that they
should be doing things differently.
And, unfortunately, some guys need to learn
the hard way.
Let him read my response to your email. Maybe
it will get his attention.
But it probably won't.
Remember, he's emotionally hypnotized right
now, and there's not much hope that he's going to stop acting
like a Wuss... no matter what.
By the way, a few thoughts on the “mom's
teaching us to be “nice” to women and buy them flowers”,
and why they teach us this stuff...
I've thought a lot about this one, and I've
even had many discussions with MY OWN MOM about this.
Of course, my mom thinks that all men should
take women to dinner, buy them things, get them gifts, and support
them financially.
As you can imagine, the conversations that
she and I have are interesting...
But think about it.
Your mom isn't going to say “Well,
son... we women don't have any idea why we feel attraction for
men, but the ones we do feel attraction for are usually difficult,
funny, mysterious, and challenging...”
Mom's are trying teach their sons to be politically
correct nice guys... and imagining an ideal young woman who
will see that wonderful, sweet, kind boy of theirs that they
taught to act like a girly-man and think he's just perfect...
They're trying to create the NICE GUY that
they WISH that THEY were attracted to.
Read that again.
They can't admit that they want the challenging,
cocky, MASCULINE guy that they read about in romance novels...
So they need something a little more “acceptable”
to turn their boy into.
The reality is that women aren't going to
teach you how to become a man that women feel an INSTANT GUT
LEVEL ATTRACTION for...
Because they CAN'T.
They don't understand it themselves.
And besides, women aren't interested in the
guys that they have to TEACH.
They want guys that TRIGGER those feelings
of ATTRACTION... not guys who need to LEARN HOW.
Thanks for your email.
Get ready to hear your buddy cry a lot more
in the future. I know, it sucks. But being a friend is not always
fun and easy.
***COMMENT FROM A WOMAN***
Dear Dave,
Reading your columns and, however hard to admit, perfect advice
is a guilty pleasure. A friend of mine completely changed his
whole way with girls after seeing the DVD series. My best friends
(one a model and the other a beautiful business woman) used
to say he was cute but kind of pathetic. Now they both commonly
use the word "sexy" when describing him.this whole change in
6 months. I signed up for your column to get a "one up" on the
David D. moves. Turns out, I'm still the biggest victim of cocky
and funny ever. 100% factual case in point (and men READ THIS!!!
And for gods sake get the Audio Book because I'd hate to think
you will make the same mistake) from two of the five dates I
went on last week.
Guy #1: Harvard MBA, millionaire, smart, good- looking, plays
polo, golf, tennis, country club, biggest Mercedes, four houses
in different cities and countries. No competing with this guy
right? WRONG! Right off the bat, Mr. "In the Bag" says how crazy
he is about me, that I look like I could be a model or a TV
news caster (I expected this). Offers to pay my December rent.
Recounts his current court battles with his ex-wife over money
and how he still sends money to his coke snorting ex-girlfriend.
Offers to take me to Buenos Aires THIS WEEK to look for a house
and I could pick out the curtains. Made sure to let me know
all about his VIP job. NOTHING was left to mystery and I felt
like I'd just been given a sales pitch. At the end of the date,
as we were waiting for the Valet to pull up his Mercedes, he
kind of grabbed me and awkwardly kissed me in the glaring street
light as I moved my head. He called me the next morning (8am)
to say he was so sorry because he knows the kiss went poorly
and he really liked me and wants to know if I think he is too
big of loser to go out with again and could we get together
that night? Answer? YES you are a loser (I didn't think you
were a loser, but you changed that in one night). And NO (as
much as I want to keep loving you because of your amazing resume,
I 'd throw up if you ever kissed me again) we will not go out
again.
Guy #2: Brings in about 40,000 bones a year as a graphics designer.
Offers nothing to me by way of financial stability. One inch
shorter than my 5'10. The DEFINITION of confidence: cocky and
funny, while not being an asshole. Pulls up to get me in his
old pick-up and says next time it will be on his mountain bike.
Says, "I'm thinking I'll take you to KFC, do you expect something
more?" We go to dinner for cheap Japanese Food. He refrains
from the usual round of predictable compliments and manages
to say a couple of things that completely take me by surprise.
We split the tab (I think I even offered to pay the whole thing!).
He takes me to the couch he's crashing on at his brothers while
in town. We make love throughout the night and through out the
next day. I don't say anything about commitment to this guy,
even though I count down the minutes to each of his calls, and
am dying to see him again. He keeps calling but has been mysteriously
unavailable to see me in person for 3 weeks! I'm seeing him
this weekend (driving 2 hours to HIS house in Santa Barbara!)
and am going crazy to know what will happen. I happen to know
he is still seeing other girls (he even told me last week on
the phone he kissed one and she was dying to sleep with him
but he wouldn't have sex with her), but somehow I'm still putting
myself in the mix.
MEN! Don't be guy #1. It's a waste of your time to get the MBA
and the nice Mercedes if you fuck up the fundamentals. You probably
are already guy #2. You just need to act like him and you might
have a chance of getting an intelligent, sassy, and beautiful
woman like me.
E.
Los Angeles
>>>MY COMMENTS:
In the future, all attractive women with
attractive friends that live in Los Angeles who write to me
MUST include:
1) A clear picture of themselves.
2) A clear picture of all attractive and
available friends (especially models).
3) A list of favorite restaurants that they
would like to take me to along with said friends who's pictures
are included in said email.
Got it?
Great email. You have done the male gender
a great service by being honest about your “guilty pleasure”
of reading these emails... and by telling the plain truth about
why women aren't attracted to jackasses who try too hard and
seek approval.
Well done.
Now send pictures.
***QUESTION***
David,
First off I would like to say that after reading your book,
it not only helped me reflect on past interactions with women,
but it also helped me reflect on myself as a person. After reading
Double Your Dating, it completely blew my mind when I FINALLY
realized the things I had done completely wrong in the past
with women. So with that, I'd like to share a fairly recent
experience I had with a local lifeguard hottie.
I had noticed her as soon as I entered the pool. She was very
athletic with tight abs and long dark legs that went on for
days. Shoulder length brown hair, brown eyes... Very nice. But
anyway, let's get back to my story. I'm a shorter guy... 20
years old. About 5'5", with short red hair, freckles, and an
average body. I didn't approach her initially, because I wanted
to swim and brainstorm what I wanted to say and how I wanted
to approach. Later on, as I am getting my stuff ready to leave
the pool... I notice that a couple of 11 or 12 year old BOYS
are flirting with the her. After they hang around her ladder
for about 3 minutes she seems to get annoyed by them. Bam, just
like that a light bulb flashes above my head.
So I wait until those kids leave until I make my approach...
Then I slowly walk over to her in a cocky way with a smirk on
my face and say, "You should be ashamed of yourself." Then I
paused for dramatic effect so she could wonder what the hell
I was talking about. She just kind of smiled in a way that said
"What did I do?" Then I say, "...Hitting on those 12 year old
boys like that. What's wrong with you anyway?" And then her
face lighted up and she said something sarcastic to the effect
of "Yeah I know, I can't help it." After that I thought I would
test a technique that was mentioned in a previous newsletter.
So then I asked her if I could ask a quick question. It was
then when I asked her "Are you single?" in a way similar to
asking what time it is with a straight and serious face. Of
course her face lighted up again, and she was clearly flattered
by the question... BUT she wasn't single. Damn. lol. She then
went into a spill about how she had a boyfriend for 3 years,
and she told me where she was from, etc. Looking back on the
whole thing, I think I should've followed through a little better
and still got her e-mail anyway and offer friendship, but after
I found out she wasn't single I kind of lost interest. Even
though she wasn't single, overall I still think it was a success
for me. Because she still reacted in a positive way, and left
me with a feeling that if she was single, I KNOW I would have
been able to get her e-mail and number.
Now to the question... I have only read the book once... And
I THINK I get it. BUT, I think I should read it again once or
twice. So that I KNOW I get it. Even though your techniques
are making sense and hit close to home for me... I can't seem
to find the motivation to go out and meet women. I don't know
what it is, but it's almost like I would rather spend my nights
at home instead of getting out of the house to meet women. I
think it may be a confidence issue, and I should just read the
book again a couple times.
Nice work David. The newsletter is GREAT. Keep it up man.
J.B., Missouri
p.s. To all the short guys out there like me. Keep your head
up. If you're 5'5 “... Walk like you're 6'5”. It
makes a huge difference. And remember, YOU'VE GOT TA STRUT!
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yea, baby.
Maybe you should do a video program called:
“HOW TO STRUT - A COURSE FOR SHORT
GUYS”
Might be a big hit... who knows.
And about rereading my book...
DUH.
That book is a REFERENCE TOOL. It's something
that you should read DAILY until you master the techniques described.
You're CRAZY if you read it once, and then
put it aside.
It's a huge mistake to not review great ideas
on a regular basis.
Good job, and read the book again!
***SUCCESS STORY***
Hey Dave,
Your stuff is pure gold as if you didn't already know. I used
to have a hard time with women and now since I got your book
it's like I don't even have to try nearly as hard and I'm getting
ten time the digits (phone #)
Anyway, I just wanted to share with you this story. I was at
the grocery store doing my food shopping. Well, as I'm going
down the frozen food section I notice this totally hot girl
about mid to late 20's looking at frozen dinners. I walked up
to her like I was just shopping and notice she's looking at
frozen meals, the type you throw in the microwave. So I ask
her if that was for her dog and she didn't even look up at me
and said it was for her boyfriend for when she goes away this
weekend. So I told her that if I was her boyfriend and she left
that crap for me that she'd come back to find all her stuff
on the front porch with the door locks changed. So she finally
looks up with this look of disbelieve as if to say "oh no you
just didn't" So I just laugh at her and ask her if she knows
how to cook. She says a little but not really and I tell her
that's to bad because the way to a guys heart is through his
stomach. She's laughs again and tells me she can make spaghetti.
Then I tell her any moron can boil water and throw in some noodles
and laugh at her again. The whole time she had this look as
if she's never been talked to like this, along with a big smile.
So I TOLD her to give me her email address and I'll send her
some recipes so that her poor boyfriend doesn't starve to death.
She laughs and says that he's on his way out anyway and gives
me her email and phone number (which I didn't tell her to give
me) and says that she'd like some good recipes anyway. So I
wait 5 days and send her an email and tell her if she screws
up my mother's recipe that I'll have to kick her ass. She write
back within the hour and asked if I wanted to meet her for a
drink. I said that I couldn't today but maybe next week I'd
be available. Immediately she writes back and says that she
broke up with her boyfriend and wanted to get to know me. So
I write back the next day and say "good for him, maybe now he'll
get a decent meal" That went over perfect because she wrote
me back and asked me again to met for drinks, I replied that
since she's not playing hard to get that I will and tell her
I'll only met her for drinks if she buys. She says she'll meet
me the next day at 7:00 at the local bar. I arrived at around
7:15 and walk right up to the bar, I saw her in the corner but
didn't make eye contact. So I order a beer and then I hear her
over my shoulder "I'll get that beer for him" The rest is history!
Thanks again Dave, two months ago I would have just checked
out her ass and kept walking, now I'm hitting that ass! All
you guys out there GET THE DAMN BOOK ALREADY!!!!!
- K.L.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
You know, you're kind of funny in a beer
commercial kind of way...
Classy.
“... two months ago I would have checked
out her ass and kept walking, but now I'm hitting that ass...”
It's special.
You ever think of becoming a greeting card
writer or something?
You sound like you'd be good at writing things
that make women feel happy and special in their hearts.
OK, OK... I have to admit that your letter
was pretty entertaining.
You're obviously have a good, strong understanding
of how to dial up the Sexual Tension... very nice.
Call Hallmark. Maybe they're looking for
writers...
***QUESTION***
Hello, I am a very smart person (iq of about 160), and i often
feel like most women are not up to my level of intellect; their
gregariousness simply amuses me. They always seem to move away
from me, i dont understand why. I am always the first guy to
give them compliments, and tell them "i love you." What am i
doing wrong? Your c+f technique is horrible, although I have
used it on my mom and dad and they are suddenly attracted to
me. Is this normal?
F.Z
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yea, you sound pretty smart.
Maybe you should go take the I.Q. test again.
Sounds like you might have gotten a person
who put a 1 in front of your score on accident, man.
Get it checked again.
***QUESTION***
Davo,
[I] Was just reading the latest email, & felt like sharing my
two cents (and experiences) with ya. I'll start off by saying
that the comment you made (in the Advanced Series) to sort of
personalize your cocky-funny attitude is spot on. When I first
got the book/cds, I thought laying on as much cocky/funny as
possible was the way to go. I still think it is in cases, but
in the cd, you mention that good looking guys should tone down
the cocky a bit. This is sooo true. I do a bit of modeling,
but I never had any real confidence. I find what works best
for me is to just project my self- confidence, make sure I stand
out from the wussies, and keep as much humor as possible with
just a bit of cocky here and there. Works like a charm.
Oh and one cool thing I like to do, is to have fun with the
c/f, and then to TELL the girl how NICE a guy I am. They sooo
get it, & its like you say- the difference between the words
you use and what youre SAYING. The funny thing is, the ladies
actually do think of you as a great guy when you have fun with
them and tease them. And they will still think of you as nice
AND be attracted to you, because you are actually giving them
what they want. They appreciate you "bantering" with them, they
love it! Better being seen as nice than a nice guy I say.
Sorry to take a third para, but I've got one quick story that
worked a charm. I'm a pilot, and where I work there is a overwhelming
majority of guys & one girl who gets most of the attention 'cos
there isn't really anyone else. When I started there, these
guys were being classic wusses and doing most of her work for
her etc. kissing her butt, the whole deal. Anyway, I called
her on it, gave her sh** for it, and the best bit of all- I
told all the other guys to stop doing that stuff for her, with
her right there. This showed her that I new exactly what was
really going on. Anyway that was a few months ago, we've spent
"a bit of time together" ;) & I had forgotten all about it and
assumed she had too. Well, a few days ago she brought it up
& said "how much of a jerk" I was to do that. Shows that its
still working in my opinion.
Cheers
- C.B., Australia
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Verrrrry nice.
Now you're getting it.
The fact that you had the nerve to tells
guys to stop being such Wussies to a girl... with her standing
right there... IS FANTASTIC.
And teasing a girl until she's flustered,
then turning it around and telling her what a nice guy you are...
another brilliant move.
Always send mixed messages... because it's
damn fun, and women love it.
***QUESTION***
Yo David D,
Ok I have written you before and have never seen my emails in
your mailbag, and I just want to say ...THANK YOU FOR NOT RESPONDING!!!
I was asking all the stupid questions like "how do I make her
see I am the one?" And saying stupid crap like " she is the
only one for me." WHAT A WUSS I WAS BEING! I took the advice
you told one guy to do, I wrote YSSUW on a piece of paper and
looked in the mirror with it. Since then I have taken your advice
and said NEXT. I want to keep this short but let me tell you
I have had no lonely times since. So in short, you are the man
I am going to purchase the advanced series this week. You saved
me from a life of approval seeking WUSSDOM. Thanks a bunch.
S.E.R., NC
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yea, well that'll learn ya' about sending
me jackass emails!
Congratulations on actually making the WUSSY
sign and looking at yourself with it.
I know it sounds strange, but things like
that make an impression on your mind... and help.
I think you're going to be OK.
Now send in a killer success story, and share
the details!
***SUCCESS STORY***
Hi David,
This story is especially for the guys (like me) who have a hard
time making the mental transition to go out and just start talking
to girls you don't know and trying the material from the Ebook
and advanced series. I found that I intellectually understood
your material and agreed with it but that when it came time
to try and really put it into practice that I was still too
nervous and probably fearful of rejection to relax and use the
material properly. My discovery came accidentally one day when
I was returning from a transcontinental trip. I was so tired
from the long journey (at least 24 hours straight in taxis,
buses, airports and flying) that I found myself in kind of a
strange mental state where I just didn't give a sh** what anyone
thought of me per se. Not in a rude or aggressive way but just
no real fear of censure or anything. It was amazing that even
as I walked through airport and to a couple of stores doing
some grocery shopping on way home with this attitude girls were
smiling at me and making more direct eye contact than I ever
usually get. Just from the different way I must have walked
and carried myself with this I don't give a shit attitude! Amazing.
While checking out at a grocery store I found myself teasing
cashier, a beautiful young woman, before I even realized what
I was doing and I just didn't care. Can't remember exactly how
the exchange went but was something like this:
[as she was checking my things she hesitated for a second on
a bottle of wine looking for price or something]
Me: Hey hey easy on the merchandise. If you want one go and
get one yourself
Her: [looking at me kind of confused but with hint of smile
already] no uh I was just looking for the price?
Me: Yeah sure. and don't try to talk me into inviting you over
to share it either
(She smiles bigger this time. Eyes change way they are looking
at me kind of focus down and tighten like she is hunting or
something - seriously it was kind of freaky - and she kind of
starts mumbling some lame thing about she was really just looking
for price - I Interrupt her in middle of this with a patronizing
tone this time)
Me: at least if you're going to hit on me have the guts to admit
it. {then kind of leaning in and whispering) and you might want
to work on your technique a bit. It's kind of cheezy after that
I had her write email on back of receipt. When I woke up next
day and thought back over it it really seemed like that was
someone else inhabiting my body or it had just been a dream
except that i had the receipt and email. So I was amazed but
thought of it as a one time fluke. However after a few weeks
I had to stay up really late on a project and was just dead
tired the next day at work. Again I noticed that I just didn't
care and was very relaxed and again had no problem utilizing
the material on new or already known women. I'm not really sure
why it works or that it would work for anyone else but its helped
me get started on making this mental switch. Thanks for all
the great Material Dave and sorry this is so freaking long.
- D from Seattle
p.s. really hope you can print this one as I think other more
timid readers might be able to relate and get something from
this
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Wow, nice!
I think that maybe what I should advise guys
to so is stay up for 24 hours straight, then go out to meet
women...
You know, wait until you're in some bizarre,
faded state of mind... then go out and talk to girls.
Sounds tight.
I'll tell you, though...
Your stories are great.
The idea of accusing a female checker of
“putting her hands on your merchandise” is fantastic.
And then implying that she's trying to pick
up on YOU... and that she's hinting that she wants you to invite
her to share... VERY good.
And I also like the idea of having her write
her email on the back of a receipt. Very nice.
You're learning, young Jedi.
Keep it up.
***QUESTION***
Hey Dave,
Your stuff is amazing. I've been using your techniques for about
half a year now and I'm seeing how much of an idiot I used to
be OBSESSING over the same girls over and over, always being
the nice guy. I would constantly be extremely nice *cough* be
a wussy *cough* to the point where I thought my new cologne
had a secret girl repellent or something. Now that I've adopted
your ways I feel completely refreshed and confident, like a
brand new man. I can now get girls that I thought were way out
of my league as easy as pie. I have a couple questions though.
My best friend, who has pretty low confidence because he has
never had a serious girlfriend before, (the only one he had
was using him to get to me), sees me "perform" my new abilities
with ease, yet he is still too stubborn to try this out. He
says he's happy being the person (wussy) he is, and that women
will just have to accept him for who he is. I tried explaining
this philosophy to him many times, and we usually end up getting
into a fight about it. I can't even convince him to sign up
for this newsletter because he is afraid of being "fake". I
need some advice to help him, thanks.
OK, onto my next question. This is the only real problem I have
when dealing with women. From time to time, they tell me they
are fat and ugly and worthless. I'm not sure whether to agree
to bust on them, or to console them. I know busting on them
would follow the guidelines of the C+F attitude, but I think
if I AM too harsh it would be more detrimental than good. On
the other hand, if I do console them by saying at least "No,
you aren't," that makes me look like a wussy, and just a feel-good
go to compliment guy. I think this is a situation that a lot
of guys have to deal with, because a bunch of America's women
do have low- self esteem and look to guys to uplift their mood.
Seriously though, Dave, I'd still be wondering how to impress
the next girl I obsess with if it weren't for me finding your
website. Thanks.
P.D., Methuen, MA
>>>MY COMMENTS:
OK, advice to help your friend:
Get him a subscription to Playboy. He's going
to be dating his right hand for a LOOOONG time.
Advice on your second question:
If a woman says “I'm fat and ugly”...
RUN.
Just stand up, and RUN AWAY.
If she IS fat and ugly, then you probably
aren't going to want a date with her...
And if she ISN'T fat and ugly, but she THINKS
that she is... then you've got a bigger problem than you think.
The last thing you need in your life is a
woman with a screwed up self image and emotional problems.
If you MUST pursue a woman who says “I'm
fat and ugly”, just reply “Your words, not mine”
and get on to the next topic.
And do yourself a big favor... find women
who aren't messed up in the head. It's much more fun in the
long run.
***QUESTION***
Dave,
I really appreciate the mental process of taking a complex concept
or problem and boiling it down to something simple other people
can wrap their brains around and you are the master, my friend.
Reading your ebook and newsletter I've about bruised my forehead
slapping it when saying to myself: "DUH!" At my age (53) and
going for women close to my age, it doesn't all apply as much
as it does for your normal target audience but enough does that
it's changed my love life!
I've always been super-shy when it comes to initially meeting
women (although I grew out of the wussy stage years ago - life's
too short for that) and I work at home and don't do bars so
I decided to use the Internet services. I wasn't having much
luck but I got your ebook and thought I'd try the C+F there,
with nothing to lose, kind of using it as a practice field.
Cut to the chase: I wrote to a cute lady in New Jersey (I'm
on the West Coast so I had nothing to lose) and said "I've got
two questions for you: Why are you in New Jersey and when's
the next flight from Newark to Seattle?" She came back with
a schedule of flights going the other direction! She was jumping
right in the game. We've had fun teasing back and forth for
a while but to make a long story short, she booked a flight
out here for next month. No way was I going to wuss out and
buy a ticket to New Jersey first, I waited for her to make that
move first. Then I booked my flight east.
Now here's one your readers might get a kick out of and maybe
even use. When I still thought nothing was really going to come
of this and got bored with the chitter chatter I figured what
the hell and stepped it up to the next level. Out of the blue
I told her I thought she has a nice looking neck and I'd like
to take my tongue and trace a line from her shoulder to her
ear and nibble on it. Magic! I've used this one on a few other
women and I find it works wonders; one told me she could feel
the chills when she read it. Now, if I hadn't stuck with the
C+F all along, what would she have felt? "Dirty old man! You're
outa here!" We're never too old to learn.
- O.J., Kirkland, WA
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Hey, great job, man.
Now, before you get too excited about this
girl from NJ that you met online...
Here are a few tips for you:
1) Get at LEAST 10 pictures
of this woman... and make sure that they were ALL taken within
the last 30 days.
2) Make sure it's HER in the
pictures she sends over to you.
3) If you can, GET VIDEO. It's
worth it to have her get a cheap USB webcam so you can see what
you're dealing with.
4) Make sure her return flight
is FLEXIBLE, and that there are flights back to NY SOON after
she arrives.
Why?
Because I've seen and even experienced many
things that would make you want to run and hide if you saw them...
You might be the type of guy who isn't as
concerned about how a woman looks.
That's fine.
But I'm trying to make sure that you're getting
what you're EXPECTING.
I'll tell you, having someone fly across
the country is serious... if she shows up and happens to look
NOTHING like her one single glamour shot taken ten years ago
when she was 47 pounds lighter and before she started wearing
wigs... you're going to have a BIG surprise.
Take it from me... really.
Get the details... and make sure there are
flights that are OPEN to NJ...
***QUESTION***
Hi Dave.
Just a note to say "thanks" for your daily e-mails. They keep
my attitude sharp! The kind of attitude you describe works not
only with women, but with others, including my boss!
Now a word in reply to the guy who wrote about capturing the
attention of the hottest stripper in town. I'm old (61), short
and fat, but after raising my kids and getting divorced, I've
had the time of my life! I had a friend who supplied local models
and strippers with stage costumes and shoes, and when she invited
me to be her assistant, I took her up on it. Wow! I'm naturally
cocky and funny, and these girls never saw me as a "pursuer"
so guess what? I've had an endless string of beauties (these
girls "refer" guys they like to each other). I currently get
phone calls from about 4 a day, which is all I can handle. The
point of this is that, while they're fun (and ego- boosting),
they're not "settling down" material. During the time I've had
all the 10s any guy could handle, a couple of really nice women
appeared on the scene, and guess what? I totally wussified!
Somehow, I didn't realize the things that worked with "hot"
women would work with any woman. Until I read your stuff, I
couldn't figure out why I was so successful with women guys
drool over and so unsuccessful with "real" women. Now I know.
I even know why my ex left. Over the years, I became a TOTAL
wussy with her without even realizing it! It just happened so
gradually.even though she said over and over and over she hated
"WIMPS!" Thanks, Dave, for turning on the light for me! I'm
one of those really bright guys you talk about who never realized
what was working and what wasn't until you hit me over the head
with it.Never too late to learn, I hope.
BH, San Jose, CA
>>>MY COMMENTS:
OK, let me get this straight...
You became the ASSISTANT to a woman who supplied
costumes to strippers... and that's how you met all these girls
and had four of them a day calling you?
Something tells me that after this newsletter
we're going to see a lot of guys applying for that job all over
the world...
Interesting.
Well, you're right on...
“Nice” girls that are “settling
down material” also like men who are interesting, challenging,
and funny.
And if you start acting like a Wuss around
them, they'll use you and lose you like an old pair of shoes.
Women don't want boring, ass-kissing, predictable
guys who are uninteresting to spend time with.
All women want a guy that they feel ATTRACTION
for. And being a Wuss isn't going to make that happen... no
matter how hard you try.
If this dating stuff I teach doesn't work
out, I'll give you a ring and get some tips on how to become
an assistant for a topless dancer costume dealer.
Nice.
***QUESTION***
Dave,
I've been reading your newsletters for awhile, and bought your
ebook a few months ago, and i gotta say, your info is amazing.
Physically, im tall at 6'6, have a scared face from a rather
bad case of acne when i was a teen, and am otherwise a rather
ordinary 22 year old college student. For the longest time i
was an incredible wuss as you put it, and i never knew what
was going wrong with my relationships - i would give up all
my power, be utterly indecisive and easily intimidated by the
slightest since of disapproval from any woman. After i read
your book, i thought what you said couldnt possibly work, but
i decided what could it hurt to try it? so i just went down
to a local cafe and tried out some of your ideas and after a
week or so of tuning, i managed to get more phone numbers and
emails than i had in the last 4, 5 years. casual dating, one
night stands, stuff like that arnt really my things, but there
was one girl that id had a thing for for a long time, and one
day while hanging out with my friends after a movie at the local
mall, i saw her walking around with a group of her friends.
normally, i wouldnt have done anything, but this time i just
said to heck with it and went up and talked to her. normally
she wouldnt think twice bout me because of my overwhelming wussiness
(which i never understood before), but this time i just tried
the c&f act on her, busting on her and her friends, making comments
bout all the fashions on display in the store windows, then
just leaving back to my friends instead of getting clingy when
she started showing interest. my friends thought i was insane,
but shortly after, her and her friends came up to me and started
following us around trying to keep my attention. it just enthralled
me at how easily this change came about. at the end of the evening
she asked to exchange numbers. instead of calling her, i waited
and she ended up calling me and asking me to go back to the
mall with her for coffee at the bookstore. while there, we walked
around the mall again and she took me into a clothing store,
where i did nothing but make fun of all the styles and her for
being into all of this kinda stuff. as we were wandering through
the store, we ended up heading through the lingerie section,
and instead of getting intimidated like i normally would i made
a bunch of c&f comments about how artificial and insecure she
must be to feel like she needed all this stuff. and as we were
walking out, we ran into one of my friends who asked us what
we were doing, to which i said 'this pervert just took me through
the lingerie section! i mean, i barely know her!' this clenched
it, and afterwords she was all over me. Since then i havent
let off, and we've been in a steady relationship now for alil
over a month now, and its easily the best one iv ever been in.
I do have a question though, because of this shes become really
attached, and im not complaining at all. But in doing so, shes
done a lot of things like meet me at 5am at an airport to see
me off for the recent thanksgiving vacation, and various other
things. Shes asked me to do a few of these things to, which
i did reluctantly because i felt bad for not returning that
kind of action.. normally i wouldnt do this (for me, 5am doesnt
exist unless absolutely necessary), but im not sure what to
do. im not sure how to deal with things like this, this early
in a relationship. i know relationships arnt really your area,
but thanks for any help on this, and thanks overall for all
the information, your a lifesaver man
S.D.
>>>MY COMMENTS:
I just want you to know... all over the world,
guys are standing and cheering for you!
Nice... I really enjoyed your story.
I know what it's like to not have any idea
how to even start a conversation with a girl... never mind get
a girl's number when you first meet her...
And I know how good it feels to learn how
to get over your insecurities and then go out and make something
happen that you've always wanted.
Here's what you need to do now...
The more you be who YOU want to be, the more
she'll stay attracted to you.
You're bordering on the “relationship”
questions here, which I don't really like to get into...
And the reality is that if you give up your
own life, or put yourself aside for a woman, she will probably
begin to lose respect for you.
You can be NICE without being a WUSSY...
and you are going to have to learn how to walk that line if
you want to have a good relationship.
Keep learning this stuff... it will actually
help you even more now... and good job.
***SUCCESS STORY***
Man, this stuff is revolutionary to my heretofore limited mind.
I am a fairly classic bad boy, you know, lawyer with a Harley,
but I have always felt all thumbs with women. I was fairly successful,
mostly by dumb luck, but your materials have totally changed
how I think about women and I am only through disc six from
your series and the results have been immediate and dramatic.
The genetic information is priceless, the whole notion of appealing
to her on a genetic level is so liberating and rings so true
that I don't know quite what to say, other than, stunning.
I looked back over the women I had been successful attracting
and noticed that all of them had been attracted to me in periods
of my life where I was operating generally with high confidence.
You have given me the tools to operate with high confidence
EVERY day. You discuss your scarcity theory at length and a
similar thought from negotiation training is "operating from
a position of strength". That is mostly the secret, right there.
I always tried to use the nice guy schtick. That lame ass play
NEVER works. I wasted years with it. I am free of that chump
forever. You talk about looking at life from an attractive chick's
perspective. I have some images that really have helped me.
Take it further back, and imagine her on the playground in the
first grade. Little boys with devil's horns have constantly
picked at her and she has thought it to be GREAT FUN ever since.
That is the part of her to attract. While she has grown up,
she has created this "prince charming" in her mind that she
is looking for. And if you enter her life banging the 'nice
guy' drum she will naturally shuffle you toward that "prince
charming" ideal she has in her fanciful, romantic brain. He
is perfect and I will NEVER EVER match her expectations for
that guy. But, the little horned devils, they get to play. And
if you are enough fun, she just might try to mold you into "prince
charming". Now, there is a task that she wants to do.
I have thought of my dealings with women in some fishing terms
and metaphors that are useful. I have talked to my friends before
about "nervous water". Fishing in shallow water flats, you are
looking for fish in two to three feet of water. I mean to see
them visibly. Sometimes, you can't see them, but the water on
top of them is moving, shaking, vibrating and you just know
there are fish under there. Hence, nervous water. Dealing with
women, I like nervous water. You know, that period of time when
you are kind of posturing and she is on your radar screen. I
looked back at the women with which I had been successful over
the years and realized there had always been nervous water in
the beginnings with them. You teach how to create nervous water
beautifully.
Further with the fishing imagery....My classic nice guy schtick
has me usually with several women merely kind of on the line,
maybe biting, maybe not. I would tell friends "I can't get her
close enough to the boat." And in my mind it involved some tiresome
cranking, winding in and reeling her toward the boat. It had
never occurred to me that maybe I could get her to swim toward
the boat. You teach how to do that. This stuff is totally amazing.
Yesterday, I had three project women on my radar screen, I tried
some different things I learned from you and have all three
of them swimming toward the boat. In fact, I had a women in
my arms on her couch with her clothes half-off last night, when
I told her I had to go. That has brought a mad run to the boat
this morning.
Just some of the good news from the trenches, this stuff is
a WHOLE LOT OF FUN. While some of this stuff is superficially
counter-intuitive, it feels right at a core, genetic level.
Thanks for the fishing tips and Happy Fishing and Happy Thanksgiving.
~ KH
Since I wrote that note above a few days ago, I cannot believe
the totally fascinating encounters I have been having with women
pretty much non stop. Within minutes we are talking about sex.
A beautiful yoga instructor who lives in my neighborhood was
just over to watch a movie- Don Juan DeMarco. What a hoot! After
the movie we talked about her love of threesomes and her small
minded boyfriends. Come to f----- papa!
>>>MY COMMENTS:
Yea yea yea... OK, no guys like you, and
your friends don't want to talk to you.
I get it.
lol...
By the way, it's interesting that you mentioned
learning from my program how to make women feel ATTRACTION for
you on a GENETIC level...
As you know from listening to my Advanced
Series, I really believe that most women have an “Attraction
Mechanism” that is only triggered if you either AUTOMATICALLY
trigger it because you ACCIDENTALLY do the “right”
things... or you AUTOMATICALLY trigger it because you KNOW the
right things to do.
And the guys who “accidentally”
trigger that magical feeling of ATTRACTION in women are very
few and far between...
Oh, and if you're reading this right now,
the chances are that YOU'RE NOT ONE OF THEM.
If you are, congrats.
But if you're a regular guy like me who doesn't
have women walk up to him and say “Hi, you're cute”,
then you need to LEARN HOW to trigger this GENETIC LEVEL ATTRACTION.
You have to get a clear understanding of
the things that women unconsciously respond to... and then incorporate
them into your behavior and communication.
In other words, you're not going to figure
this one out with TRIAL AND ERROR. And you're
not going to figure it out by doing more of the same thing you've
been doing for the last several YEARS of your life...
I'll tell you something that I find VERY
interesting.
After spending several years watching guys
who are “naturals” with women, paying careful attention
to what they do differently from other guys who have little
or no success... and then adding research of how and why women
respond the way they do to everything from body language to
eye contact to their own genetic programming... I've realized
that there are several “Master Keys” that a guy
needs to understand and “get” before he can have
consistent success with women.
I've read that something like 95% of the
population in America that reach the age of 65 years old are
either DEAD or DEAD BROKE... this means that only 1 in about
20 people are financially independent by the time they reach
retirement age.
When I read that I thought to myself “You
know, I'll bet that all the people that reach age 65 and are
broke THOUGHT that they'd make it big, and that they didn't
need to worry about saving money during their lives...”.
I know so many people that just don't pay
attention to the important things... and they wind up getting
into all kinds of trouble as a result.
What does this have to do with you?
Well, maybe nothing, and maybe everything.
I think that most guys who aren't successful
with women are thinking one of two things:
1) I'll never be successful, so I might as well just accept
it, and learn to deal with it.
2) I need to make a lot of money, buy a nice car, and take women
to fancy dinners and offer them a great lifestyle in order to
make women like me.
Of course, these are mental lies that actually
HURT us.
These are the kinds of thoughts that keep
us from DOING SOMETHING about our situations... and that lead
to us winding up either ALONE or IN HORRIBLE RELATIONSHIPS.
In either case, the feeling of desperation
just sucks... and it doesn't have to be this way!
So what's the answer?
Well, I think the answer is to put yourself
out there, and LEARN how to attract women.
Instead of leaving it to chance, and winding
up like all the other MAJORITY of men who have horrible success
with women... you have to get up off your ass and make it happen.
I did. And it took me a damn long time.
I tried more stupid stuff and made more mistakes
than anyone I know...
But after working on it for a LOOOONG time,
I finally “cracked the code”.
And I really want you to learn all the things
it's taken me so long to figure out. But you're the one who
has to do it.
So if you haven't gone and downloaded my
online eBook, then you need to do that now. It contains literally
dozens and dozens of great tips, concepts, and techniques that
you can use RIGHT NOW to improve your success with women. Go
download it right now here:
David DeAngelo
is the author of “Double Your
Dating - What Every Man Should Know About How To Be Successful
With Women”, and has taught
thousands of men how to be more successful with women and dating.
Copyright 2010 David DeAngelo Communications
Inc., All Rights Reserved. "David DeAngelo" and "Double Your
Dating" are trademarks used by David DeAngelo Communications
Inc.
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